So. My family is into stand up paddle boards. Which is great.
Its good exercise, its easy, its calming.
This is what they told me and I, naively, believed them.
We all boarded up and headed down to a local river near our house.
Side note: Its SO stunning. And SO peaceful. I have missed the calmness and beauty of the Aussie bush!
Before we left I asked if I should wear swimmers.
Don’t worry, they said.
Its easy, they said.
I have never seen anyone fall in, they said.
You’ll be fine, they said.
On the way I get a prep talk about how to board and find balance. And soon after we were there and getting in the water.
And for the first half hour I was fine. It was awesome.
Calm. Pretty. Easy. Everything they said.
I was steadily paddling down stream and enjoying the ride.
And then I bragged.
Half a second later, the wind picked up. And the little lake became a little wind tunnel. We had to turn around and head back, up stream, to our beach spot.
Let me just say this right now, heading up stream is HARD. Its ESPECIALLY hard when you are a beginner, you are freezing, its windy as all get out and you are the size of a small child.
Well, I tried to turn the board, and became stuck in the currant. I wielded my paddle around, trying to straighten up and get moving.
Within five seconds I was flying through the air with my paddle, screaming, landing in the “crisp”water… which my brother had just, moments before, told me he “had seen a few bull sharks in this year”.
I swam, soaked, and clambered onto my board, which was flying down stream. I slip and slid and flew off again. Jake comes to help and I get up and on. And try to get going.
So here I am, half drowned, shaking, wind blown and crazily paddling upstream.
I wish I could say that it ends there….
I went well for a few minutes, and made ground, before being swept off again. And ending ever so elegantly sprawled in the water… Again flying down stream. Again soaked and trying to recover.
Needless to say, it was a LONG trek back. And I ended on my knees paddling like mad trying to get there.
When we FINALLY all came ashore, me drenched and freezing, I had one thing to say to them.
“No one EVER falls in!”
New Little *Paddle-Boarding* Wife