Why?

Yesterday was the roughest day I have had in a long long time. Bad news upon bad news had me down, out and crying for a long long time.

Some days are fragile.

Plans get broken, dreams are made and fail just as quickly, and we are turned around more times than we can even think..

And at the end of it, we have no idea whats happening and where we are going.

And I was.. Mad. I was angry. I was annoyed. And broken. Upset. Stressed. Sad.

I was lost.

I didn’t have any answers for the questions I was asking.

And my only prayer to heaven was why God?

WHY?

Because, sometimes, it hurts.

It hurts to know God can heal this. And fix that.

To know He can change the outcome of this. And to help us with that.

It hurts to not understand.

Sometime we cry out to Heaven and all we seem to get is silence. Sometimes we plea. We bargain. We make trades.

And still we get silence.

And still we get No’s.

And the pain gets more real. And the tears keep coming.

And the questions lay un answered. And the meaning still unknown.

But this morning I woke up. And I realised some things;

The first being this;

It hurts God TOO.

It hurts Him to see us like this. He cries when you are crying. He hears your pleas, and He listens to your cries.

And His heart breaks.

He Knows.

And He cares.

Second; He knows what he is doing.  He HAS a plan.

And it is worth FAR more than the pain we feel now.

Oh we don’t see it, and we have no idea what that plan is. And when our world is in turmoil, we struggle to hold on, but HE has one.

And it’s better than ours.

Its better than those dreams that got crushed. Its better than those plans WE made that got changed yet again. Its better.

And He promises its worth it. He never says its easy. Or pain free. Its never straight forward. And its painful. And unknown.
But its worth it.

Third; Sometimes Heaven’s answers is Just Hold On.

Its coming. HE is coming.

Its almost liked He leans down and whispers softly, like that still small voice…

Just hold on.

I know it hurts. I know its hard. I know what your feeling. Just hold on. 

I promise you it is ALL worth it.  I promise you, at the end of the day, in the light of eternity, It is worth it.

Trust me.

Four; He never leaves me. He will never forsake me. I am never so low, so far gone, that He cannot help me.

And he will. And he IS.

Even when He seems silent. He is there

Even when I feel lost. He is there.

Even when it seems He has stopped working in my life. He is going at it overtime.

Even when it seems like He is giving me bad after bad. He is working it all out for my good.

Even when I feel like I have no where to go. He is there.

And His arms are always open.

 

He is there. He knows. He hears. He cares.

Love,

New Little * Why?* Wife

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